Back

I am here. Not "home" in the sense of finality, but I am back at that place which is familiar to me. There are the same smells, expressions, voices, cats, and faces which have accompanied me through the world. Perhaps this is the first time in a long time that I feel good to be here. There is usually that tension of wanting to break free of these roots which I considered myself to no longer fit into, but now I feel that I am my own enough to be here and not be threatened.
It has been a while since I last wrote here. "No time". Time. I was reading Heschel's book on the Sabbath, which is about time. Then I began to think about this summer. And I am thinking that I should go to the mountains for a month or two. I need a period of time with nothing planed that I can sit in and just be. Am I romanticizing? Does this not exist? Or would some argue that it is a waste of time to do such a thing? Our busy culture tells us that the answer to life's meaning is found in amassing something: knowledge, money, people, clothes etc. hm. I am fed up with it. I no longer want to participate in this. Perhaps I just need a break. So I think I would like to take a break.

Today, the first morning back, is being planed even as I write. It feels good to blog again. It feels so god to not have deadlines. I am content at the moment and enjoying it very much.